Funny Quotes To Lift Your Spirits Up And Brighten Your Day (2024)

When you’re in a funk, there’s nothing like funny quotes to turn your day around.

Sometimes, one laugh can make all the difference. A few words on a page can make you smile and transform your entire mood. This is why comedians and actors have jobs. Their superpower is that they can provoke lasting and life-changing emotions in their audiences. Think of your favorite funny movie. Doesn’t it turn your day around no matter what?

Funny quotes have the same power. They remind you to take a step back and enjoy the little things in life. That’s because there’s humor to be found in every aspect of life! From family to money, all of us share similar sentiments about our realities. Some are just better at putting those sentiments into hilarious quotes.

From beloved comedians to revered historic figures, here are 30 quotes to make you giggle any day of the week.

Funny Quotes About Life…

1. “Sometimes you lie in bed at night and you don’t have a single thing to worry about. That always worries me!” —Charlie Brown

2. “You won’t burn in hell. But be nice anyway.” —Ricky Gervais

3. “Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.” —Unknown

4. “What turning forty means to me? I need to take my pants off as soon as I get home. I didn’t used to have to do that, but now I do.” —Tina Fey

5. “You’re only as good as your last haircut.” —Fran Lebowitz

6. “The lion shall lie down with the calf, but the calf won’t get much sleep.”—Woody Allen

7. “Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week.” —Spanish proverb

8. “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” —Elbert Hubbard

9. “Finally my winter fat is done. Now I have spring rolls.” —Unknown

10. “Instant gratification takes too long.” —Carrie Fisher

Funny Quotes About Family…

1. “When your children are teenagers, it’s important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.” —Nora Ephron

2. “The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice cream.” ―Bill Murray

3. “My parents said marrying was an optimistic thing to do in pessimistic times.” —Olivia Wilde

4. “My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now and we don’t know where the hell she is.” —Ellen Degeneres

5. “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.” —Winston S. Churchill

6. “My father always said, ‘Never trust anyone whose TV is bigger than their bookshelf.’” —Emilia Clarke

7. “A two-year old is kind of like a blender, but you don’t have any top for it.” —Jerry Seinfeld

8. “If you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them.” —Reese Witherspoon

Funny Quotes About History…

1. “If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn’t have declared their independence from it.” —Stephen Colbert

2. “Sometimes I want to go back in time and punch myself in the face.” —Unknown

3. “History repeats itself; historians repeat one another” ―Robert Brooke

4. “Everyone said to Vincent van Gogh, “You can’t be a great painter, you only have one ear.” And you know what he said? “I can’t hear you.”―Steve Carell

5. “I can’t understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.” ―George Burns

Funny Quotes About Money…

1. “Filling out a credit card application, my friend came upon this question: ‘What is your source of income?’ She wrote: ‘ATM.’” —Michael Mcrae

2. “It’s money. I remember it from when I was single” — Billy Crystal

3. “They say love is more important than money…Have you tried paying your bills with a hug?” —Dave Chappelle

4. “Money is the best deodorant.” – Elizabeth Taylor

5. “I’d like to live like a poor man – only with lots of money.” —Pablo Picasso

6. “Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it’s about having a lot of options.” —Chris Rock

7. “I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.” —Jim Carrey

What’s better than laughter? Laughing together! Whenever you find yourself or someone you know feeling down, any of these funny quotes will definitely make anyone feel better. Laughter is contagious, so share this collection of funny quotes with someone you know who could use a smile today.